Welcome to Grandma Cuddles!

Day Care with a Twist

It can be tiring to be a parent! You want your life back. You want the freedom to go see a movie without a screaming child. You long for nights bar-hopping with friends, waking up missing a tooth on a cold tile floor in a stranger's bathroom. Sure, at the time, you thought you might be overdoing it. But that was before Baby. Now, you realize how good you really had it.

Don't spend your drinking money on another Holiday toy for your little darling to abandon five minutes after unwrapping it. For just a few pennies more, you can give all that worry and fuss to Grandma Cuddles. Your Little Precious goes to Grandma Cuddles, and you go back to your life while Grandma Cuddles turns your little problem into your little opportunity.

Children Can’t Cry Forever 

Grandma Cuddles loves nothing more than watching tender, young faces pressed against the glass, crying and crying as their parents drive off in the distance. But those beloved munchkins aren’t being abandoned! No, indeed. Grandma can’t wait to bring them into the Grandma Cuddles family. There’s not a single living child on our happy campus who hasn’t become a fully productive member of the Grandma Cuddles community.  

Children can’t cry forever. We know. We’ve run the tests.  

Your Children Get an Early Start 

Did Grandma Cuddles say “productive?” Yes, indeed! Our happy campers learn quickly to contribute to the well-being of the community. From the moment the first whistle blows at 6:15 a.m. until quitting time at 11 p.m., Cuddles Kids spend their time in a variety of activities that are both educational and can be used to generate immediate income, for those families that wish to offset even the modest cost of Grandma Cuddles.  

Our exciting educational programs can include:  

  • Metal shop where children learn to emboss slogans like “XWL-2000” and “RS 5233” on metal plates that can even be affixed to cars to proudly display your child’s handiwork for all to see.
  • Advanced Origami where children learn to insert tab A into slot B, creating three dimensional boxes of all sizes that can be used as adorable ornaments under the holiday greenery, or even for such useful purposes as packing up items!
  • Physical Training where kiddies build strong, healthy hearts by picking up, carrying, and putting down boxes of metal slogans, for shipment to our fellow day care centers in a variety of countries. 

What Are You Waiting For?

It’s now or never. Turn your money-and-time-sucking child into a family asset! Drop them off at Grandma Cuddles and get the benefits of child rearing that you deserve! 

Discipline Policy

Grandma Cuddles feels very strongly about discipline. She tolerates no misbehavior on the Granda Cuddles Campus.  

But unlike harsh schoolmarms of the past, Grandma Cuddles would never, ever engage in the kind of corporal punishment that leaves permanent marks on tender young flesh.  

Grandma Cuddles insists on handling all discipline issues herself. She uses gentler, less invasive forms of discouragement. Her very own “enhanced discipline techniques” cause no physical damage, and leave a strong psychological desire on young minds to be well-behaved and perform at their tip-top best next time around.  

In discipline room Room 101, a child is simply exposed to the natural consequences of their own misbehavior. Each discipline experience is customized for the child involved, and often is even educational, as students are given exposure to animals from our very own zoo. Enhanced discipline is as harmless—and effective—as taking a simple sip of water.